lunadelcorvo: (Can it be A time now?)
1. The Arian Doctrine (a) is alive and well in Christianity today, as most people don't think Jesus is divine. (I have gotten four papers making this claim this week alone.)

2. Most Christians believe that human souls reincarnate into the first living being they come across, be it human, dog, cat, whatever, (c) just as the Cathars believed. (d) However this is wrong because it "can alternate someone's knowledge of what's right and what's wrong."(e)

3. The Episcopal Church split from the Catholic Church in the early 2000s.

4. Priests and ministers today are not concerned with wealth or greed, and the materialism of the medieval church has thankfully been done away with. Likewise, the priesthood lives a far more moral, pure and ethical life than in the past. (f)

5. A personal greeting from the pastor gives a churchgoer a warm and sinister feeling. (g)

6. Harold Camping's end of the world predicament caused a lot of trouble, but was only one of many such predicaments foretelling the end times.

Some days, I hate grading papers. *headdesk*

NOTE: I had to go from asterisks to letters, because once you get up to four or five asterisks, it's just silly.

(a) Named after its intellectual father, Arius, the Arian(b) doctrine teaches that Jesus is a created being, neither fully divine nor of one substance with the father. It was condemned as a heresy by the council of Nicea, thus the origin of the Nicene Creed, recited weekly at an overwhelming majority of Christian churches of all stripes. Ironically, all of my students claim to in fact BE Christians, despite not having a clue what they believe.

(b) Not to be confused with the doctrine of the Aryan Race, the pro-white drivel popularized by the Third Reich. I am actually quite surprised this has not yet happened.....

(c) Wasn't this the premise of a movie with Denzel Washington, but wasn't it some demon that did this?

(d) No, they didn't. They believed you would be born again as a human just as before, and that this was the worst fate imaginable, as the aim of Catharism was to purify the spirit of all taint of the filth of the material world.

(e) Yes, I know it looks like this sentence is written in English, but that just shows how dumb you are and how clever my students are! (I'm currently holding a translation contest: submit your entry on the back of a $20.)

(f) Clearly, my students have never heard a news broadcast.

(g) Actually, on this one, I couldn't agree more!


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Things I need to remember:
• Asking for help is not, as it turns out, fatal.
• Laughing is easier than pulling your hair out, and doesn't have the unfortunate side effect of making you look like a plague victim.
• Even the biggest tasks can be defeated if taken a bit at a time.
• I can write a paper the night before it's due, but the results are not all they could be.
• Be thorough, but focused.
• Trust yourself.
• Honesty, always.

Historians are the Cassandras of the Humanities



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